Inside The Fire

Over the past several years, I have tried to make every moment of my life count, though that is sometimes challenging to remember. Life is simply too short not to live in every opportunity. I have often found that it is easy to live your life from moment to moment not really focusing on anything more important than to-do lists. There is a giant difference in living your life, enjoying each drop it can offer, and living to complete daily activities and routines. It is easy to become so accustomed to completion of petty tasks that you get caught up in not really living to experience what life has to offer. It is the experience and growth that matters, not the completion you find in the end.

Therefore, I have always connected to the following song lyrics. Old? Yep. Out of contexts? Possibly. Depends on how you hear it. Nothing beats an old Garth Brooks song.

Find it here.

"So hell bent on living, walking a wire,

Convinced it's not living if you're standing outside the fire.

Standing outside the fire.

Standing outside the fire.

Life is not tried, it's just merely survived

If you're standing outside the fire.

There's a love that is burning, deep in my soul,

Constantly yearning to get out of control,

Wanting to fly, higher and higher.

I can't abide

Standing outside the fire."

Welcome Meredith!

Lucy the dog, BEWARE! There is a new dog in the house!

Judd and I have become temporary surrogate parents of Meredith the puppy for the next few weeks. Meredith is the new doggy belonging to my sister, Jillian, and her boyfriend, Andrew. Since her arrival, Meredith has made our lives a bit more eventful and given Lucy a run for her money as "alpha rat dog". Currently, Meredith has decided that our bed is the best hiding position for soggy licked doggy toys, that running (away) is far more fun when you are being chased (found), and that life is far more enjoyable when you pick the loudest squeak toy to chew on at odd hours of the night.

Other than her puppy antics, Lucy, Judd and I have enjoyed her company...even if she has taken over our bed and we wake up to her using the pillows instead of Judd and I.

Wake up Jessica!

For months it has been bothering me that my life seems to be so stressful, disorganized, and insanely busy.The month before my wedding, my mother gave me a journal and suggested I write about the first few years of my marriage. Since then, I fear that I have often struggled to keep myself focused on what really matters and I have seldom written anything at all. On a whim, I had decided that I should start blogging again in order to document those little and important moments.

As I know well, intending to do something and actually doing it are two totally different things. As I took a break today from doing the piles upon piles of building homework, I found myself reading through entries I had written over the past year. I found an entry from May 30th, 2010.

I wrote, "If life were over today, what I want to do in the future will have no meaning. The past and the present are equally important as the future. Life is too short not to live in the current moment. Jessica, reflect on the current moment and the blessings you already have instead of the ones you simply want."

Therefore, if you read this blog entry, I am asking you to help me. Please help me live in the current moment to realize my blessings. If I am not adding entries, it more than likely means that I am not focusing on what I should be.

Some things are simply more than coincidence.

Snowpocalypse!

I am currently taking an English course titled "The Bible as Literature" in order to complete my coursework at Ashland. One of my assignments this week was to write my own parable. Therefore, the following "parable" is written in response to my student teaching during the past week and the current "snowpocalypse".

There once was a student teacher. The teacher had tons and tons of homework to do but instead all she could think about was summer break. Instead of completing her responsibilities like her coursework or coaching her local cheerleading squad, all she could focus on was her upcoming vacations. Visions of sandy beaches and sleeping in danced in her head.

On day, she was so focused on her daydreams of sunshine that she completely forgot her unfinished lesson plans for the following day on her desk at work. Hours later, it suddenly dawned on her that the next day was her very important observation day with her advisor. She panicked in fear knowing that the school was already locked and she had no way of completing her lessons.

Therefore, she developed a plan. She would wake up at five in the morning and meet the janitor at the front door. She would also pray for a snow day. Little did she remember that snow days are probably not appropriate things to pray for.

The next morning developed according to plan. She woke hours before the sun came up. She tiptoed around the bedroom in the dark in attempt to not wake her sleeping husband and dog. She managed to dress professionally without ever seeing herself in a lit mirror. Proudly, she ate breakfast AND packed a lunch, both of which she had rarely done before.

Pleased with herself and her fantastic problem solving skills, she opened the garage door and started the car in the garage. As she waited for the car to warm, she decided to check her emails with a fresh cup of coffee. When she looked down at her phone, it suddenly exploded with emails!

"What's this?" she thought. "I never have this many emails suddenly in the morning....particularly THIS early."

Just then, she looked outside for the first time. Though she could not completely see in the dark, she did see something shiny....VERY shiny. Seeing as though she had lived in Ohio her entire life and was holding an exploding iphone in her hand, she knew immediately what had happened.

She had asked God for a snow day. She knew God probably had better prayer requests to handle at the moment. Besides, she should have been focused at work anyway. God did not give her a snow day. Instead, he gave her an ice day (and days and days). He gave her ice that takes days to scratch off your car only to find more ice on the car. He gave her ice that makes the CNN evening news. He gave her ice that literally made the neighbor's kid ice skate (with real ice skates) on the driveway. He gave her ice that tears the power lines out and makes you think that someone is breaking in the house when ice falls off the roof at 4am.

That week, the student teacher learned two lessons. The first was logical; quit thinking about the beach and do your homework. The second was not as expected. Be careful what you pray and wish for. When you pray for a snow day, God will still hear you. Instead, he will laugh to himself and bring...THE SNOWPOCALPSE!

I'm Baaaack!

I have decided to start blogging again. I've noticed that when I keep up the blog, I am much more "in tune" with myself and I have no reason not to continue. Therefore, even though it is February, a NEW resolution!

So here goes nothing...